Little Old Ladies

Well I returned home last week and I’ve been faced with writing a letter from Hong Kong and it’s like what do I say….  What do I write about?  What do my readers want to hear about?  I really find it hard, writers block I guess.

 

It is so mixed when I return from any place where my children can walk barefoot on the grass, breathe relatively fresh air and get fun out of watering the lawn.  Here life is full of what TV shows, coloring books and videos. The thought of going to the park (Concrete Park) is exhausting, and even if we did go the boys would be telling me that it’s too hot.

 

The first three days I stayed home, apart from avoiding the heat also the rush.  In the US someone accidentally bumped me and they apologized.  I knew I was definitely in reaction to the whole thing because I thanked them for apologizing.  Here bumping and pushing is all part of the process of going somewhere.

 

Asia has a calling to most people, and I hear that you will long for it when you go home.  But after 2.5 weeks in the US I was dreading the call.

 

I’ve learnt to push and shove to get a seat on the rail.  One of my friends says she knows she was here too long when she grabbed a little old lady, who was stealing her taxi and told her to wait for her own!  Shock, horror but after living here a while you will understand why she did it.  One of my friends showed off a fabulous bruise down the front of her forearm fighting off the umbrella of perhaps the same little old lady.  Motto: watch out for little old ladies in Hong Kong.  They have been here longer and know how to get their own seat or taxi at the cost of nothing, perhaps your pride.

 

On return from the US I had a number of email from readers looking at living here.  The question’s varied from how to get a job to can you live on a house boat in Hong Kong.  I am happy to answer questions via email. I also look forward to meeting Liza who will be joining the expat ranks.

 

Hong Kong is the New York of Asia I think.  You can have good days and bad days.  You meet some wonderful caring people and some you wonder what happened to them that made them so mad.

 

Just before we left on home leave we entertained four Navy personnel from the Cushing.  It was such a lovely evening, very interesting and pleasurable.  My husband and I felt that if we had never lived here we would never have had this wonderful experience.  To hear about their lives on board, the places they had served and the type of work they do was fascinating.  It was a pleasant break from fighting off little old ladies wielding umbrellas.

 

 

Wong Wang

My husband has been travelling for weeks it seems.  Last week he was in town so I made a doctors appointment, finally, for him to see a skin specialist the GP had recommended he see some 6 weeks prior. 

 

The GP gave us the contact name and number; I called that contact number only to find out we needed to go to the specialist’s rooms in town.  Not a problem I made the contact with this doctor who we shall call Wang.  I explained to the receptionist the booking was for my travelling husband.  Fine so we made the booking for the week he would be back.

 

Husband was relieved to be finally seeing someone about what looks like a touch of skin cancer.  I too was relieved husband was in town long enough to make time to see a doctor, let alone us.

 

So the Thursday after his return he went to Doc Wang.  About ten minutes after the designated appointment he called to let me know that I had sent him to the wrong Wang.  Not to worry this Dr Wang new the other Dr Wang and even gave husband the address and contact details.

 

I have made a new appointment for husband with the write Wang but due to weather conditions here in Hong Kong he hasn’t seen him yet and is now as I write on his way to Shanghai for a week.

 

I felt for sure when I had called directory for the phone number that I had said the right Wang – on finding the original card the GP had given us for the referral I discovered it was they who had given us the wrong Wang. 

 

Given the original doctor said to husband that it happened all the time, I would have thought his receptionist would have asked some more probing questions.  Perhaps like the Banks here they are not quite sure which wife you might be, the first or the other wife!

 

In any event I have learnt when getting referrals just check you are going to the right place.  Next time we might end up with a limb missing that never needed to be gone!  But I guess it’s one better than the guy who wasn’t put under sufficiently during his operation to then overhear his surgeon ‘buying a car’ on his mobile while operating on him.  I have an image of a surgeon scalpel in one hand phone in the other – shivers.

 

I think that case is still in court!

 

Returning to Hong Kong

 

Well I returned home last week and I’ve been faced with writing a letter from Hong Kong and it’s like what do I say….  What do I write about?  What do my readers want to hear about?  I really find it hard, writers block I guess.

 

It is so mixed when I return from any place where my children can walk barefoot on the grass, breathe relatively fresh air and get fun out of watering the lawn.  Here life is full of what TV shows, coloring books and videos. The thought of going to the park (Concrete Park) is exhausting, and even if we did go the boys would be telling me that it’s too hot.

 

The first three days I stayed home, apart from avoiding the heat also the rush.  In the US someone accidentally bumped me and they apologized.  I knew I was definitely in reaction to the whole thing because I thanked them for apologizing.  Here bumping and pushing is all part of the process of going somewhere.

 

Asia has a calling to most people, and I hear that you will long for it when you go home.  But after 2.5 weeks in the US I was dreading the call.

 

I’ve learnt to push and shove to get a seat on the rail.  One of my friends says she knows she was here too long when she grabbed a little old lady, who was stealing her taxi and told her to wait for her own!  Shock, horror but after living here a while you will understand why she did it.  One of my friends showed off a fabulous bruise down the front of her forearm fighting off the umbrella of perhaps the same little old lady.  Motto: watch out for little old ladies in Hong Kong.  They have been here longer and know how to get their own seat or taxi at the cost of nothing, perhaps your pride.

 

On return from the US I had a number of email from readers looking at living here.  The question’s varied from how to get a job to can you live on a house boat in Hong Kong.  I am happy to answer questions via email. I also look forward to meeting Liza who will be joining the expat ranks.

 

Hong Kong is the New York of Asia I think.  You can have good days and bad days.  You meet some wonderful caring people and some you wonder what happened to them that made them so mad.

 

Just before we left on home leave we entertained four Navy personnel from the Cushing.  It was such a lovely evening, very interesting and pleasurable.  My husband and I felt that if we had never lived here we would never have had this wonderful experience.  To hear about their lives on board, the places they had served and the type of work they do was fascinating.  It was a pleasant break from fighting off little old ladies wielding umbrellas.

 

 

Photos vs Words

 

Sometimes photos say more than words!  This photo was taken at the only private pilots airport in Hong Kong.  My husband has a private pilots license and for a number of years we were members of the HK Aviation club.  I have many happy memories of the Aviation Club.  We would routinely go there for a Friday night catch up while we left our children with the maid.  Later as the children were older we would take them there for Sunday night meals. 

Though I do not enjoy flying in small planes I did take a few flights with my husband over Hong Kong and even I have to admit it was a fabulous experience.  There is nothing quite like flying through HK Harbor with Hong Kong Island to one side and Victoria on the other side!  Awesome doesn’t even begin to explain it. 

This photo is one of a few funny signs I witnessed in Asia I will try and dig up some more.  I used to have one that was an advertisement for clipping feet – they meant toenails but I guess feet covers it all.

 

 

 

Combination Crisis

It’s 3am the phone rings, husband has left the day before for the US, somehow I turn on a light and remember who I am. 

 

“Hi I’m here”

 

“Great”

 

“What’s the combination to my suitcase?”

 

“Use your key for the padlock”

 

“No what’s the combination”

 

“Okay try 3333″

 

“No”

 

“okay try 1111 or 2222″

 

“NO”

 

“That’s because I put a padlock on it”

 

“Oh *#%^ I have someone else’s suitcase”

 

“bye”

 

It took me a little while to get back to sleep and meanwhile I thought about that particular suitcase.  The o/s trip last month saw that case come home with major damaged.  It had obviously had an altercation with a conveyor belt, the trim was sticking out the zipper damaged and the padlock gone. United Airlines sent out their man to collect and repair the suitcase.  I remember taking off all hanging nametags – had I replaced them – was his newly repaired suitcase marked?  Who was the unfortunate soul in the Bay Area wanting their clothes? Had I left the red ribbon on to mark our luggage?  What did he have in his suitcase?  I guess he could go to Mervyns and buy new clothes, a buying spree, wish I were there.

 

When we spoke in the morning (my morning) he had been back to SFO and picked up his suitcase.  All was back to normal.

 

Moral to story when travelling make sure you take your suitcase off the carousel. Make sure you easily mark your suitcase so you know it’s your suitcase, tie a ribbon, big colored belt around it or stickers.  Who cares if you suitcase stands out at least you won’t get to your destination and discover you have the wrong one.  You might even witness someone else picking up your suitcase from the  carousel.

 

And if you happen to meet my husband waiting for luggage remind him his case is the one with the red ribbon on it.

 

 

Happy travels

 

Side Note;

Though Samsonite’s are built to last – we have now had two eaten up by Chep Lap Kok’s conveyor belts – and the airlines have been more than willing to admit liability and fix at no cost to us.   Dragon Air did a no questions asked fix it job when I returned from Beijing last year some time and United Airlines also replaced a zipper and sewed up the side of the case in question.  In the case of Dragon Air I didn’t notice the damage till I got home – they never queried it. 

 

Men at work

When I turned 36 in Sydney I celebrated my birthday at the London Hotel in Balmain.  You know the one with the wrought iron balcony and the best view of The Bridge a pub can offer.  It only came to my attention as I was thanking my friends for being there that night they were all MEN.  Now I don’t mean to boast but for a bachelorette in Sydney I was doing quite well.  At that dinner of 9 men only two were gay and the rest were single.  I remember turning to two girls sitting at a nearby table and suggesting they join in.  Needless to say my bachelor flat mate made sure that evening those girls were not too jealous.

 

Why do I write about this you say? What has this got to do with Hong Kong? Who is interested in my former life?  The reason is simple.

 

In the last month I have had two conversations with friends here about the lack of male friends.  This conversation took place with other female friends who too were used to spending time with men.  There are many women who just gravitate to male company as against spending time with women.  Those people survive here but after a while you start to notice the lack of men in your life.

 

Sure I have three men in my life, but a three-year-olds conversation is a little different from a thirty-year-olds conversation.  In the past I have had no issue with my husband if I go out with my male buddies, in fact in Sydney last year I even slept in the same room as my old room mate.  I can’t imagine life without some of these men but here in Hong Kong I have no choice.

 

The best male friend I have is my husband; we are old friends going back twenty years, who then got married.  So we have lots of common interests and stories.  But even here in Hong Kong he’s not around to chat with.  My friends are now female and outings, dinners and lunches are often all female based. 

 

I go to lunches held by the AWA (American Women’s Association) and if you see a man there you presume he’s the guest speaker.  If you see a man in the company of a woman you know, you automatically presume they have company.  We are a member of a dinner group but more than often I go on my own, because Peter travels, and why I go is I long for that ‘male’ input into conversations.

 

I do have a male friend here and this is so unusual. The two women I was talking to about the lack of male company were completely jealous when I told them that I have a male friend here.  Stuart my single male friend has been most helpful to our family.  I’ve rung him up to fix a cupboard, hang a picture and even pretend to be Santa because Dad just wasn’t around to take a call from my oldest as to why didn’t get a train in his gift bag at the Mall!

 

So if you are planning on coming to Hong Kong as an expat be warned this is a top-heavy female place with Men being the novelty because they are AT WORK.

 

 

Shoe Stopper

As one woman said to me recently ‘a woman can never have enough shoes’.  I hope my husband never reads this article because it might explain that rather large charge on the Visa card back in June.

 

I was so depressed one day over the attitude of a clerk in the Department of Motor Vehicle here in Hong Kong – I just had to go by the Todd’s shoe store and buy a couple pairs of shoes.  I guess it was a fit of depression or a moment of insanity or just call it being female.  I had to do it.

 

I like many of my other female friends have a pertinacity to buy shoes.  I have them in all shapes and sometimes I think even sizes.  And as a female accomplice in the shoe department said to me the other day – you can NEVER have enough black shoes.  Ah a woman of my own hearts (or is that foot fetish).

 

But here in Hong Kong I am gravely punished unless it’s the Todd’s shoe store in Pacific Place.  I have trouble buying shoes.  Now unlike some of my friends who despair that a size 10 is unheard of here in Hong Kong, I suffer from the other end.  My shoe size is a mere 35 or 5 B.  Sure I can find them here but I have a wide foot and that is something that tends not to be catered for here in Hong Kong.

 

I have to seek high and low.  That’s how I found Todd’s and also just down the road in Happy Valley those wonderful stores that do shoes made to order.  Aren’t I just the lucky duck.  But better than that I always seem to come up with an excuse when I’m travelling that I just ‘need’ another pair of shoes.

 

So recently in Hawaii, Liberty department store had a sale and I agreed to meet my friend in, where else, the shoe department.  As I was waiting my toes were twitching and like a drug user I needed a fix.  I happily succumbed to a new pair of backless Black sandals.  What a treat, I would never find these practical sandals in Hong Kong.  It seems the fashion here, the last three years has been sandals but they are made for small slim feet, and look like stilettos.  These shoes are not something you can easily maneuver in or easily walk the pavement in ‘under construction’ Hong Kong.

 

Ah but I have to say a good shoe sale, or a bit of depression easily over come in any shoe department is good for the sole (excuse the pun) and good for my happier disposition in Hong Kong.

 

View of a Hong Kong Apartment

I was invited to dinner at a friend’s place last night.  I’ve known my friend for over a year in Hong Kong.  We have mutual friends in the US, through his mother. As his mother was in town I was invited to dinner.

 

Professor, as I shall call him, has never invited me over to his place. We have always extended our hospitality to our home mostly so he would have a good home cooked meal and learn mahjong.  We have spent many hours eating, drinking and ponging.  So it was with great delight I was able to accept his kind offer for dinner at his place.

 

Professor has often spoken about his place and joked about it’s size, and in our ‘year’ friendship I have helped him by finding a dining room table for him, one that folds in half, some art work and other bits and pieces.  So I was looking forward to seeing his small but humble abode in Mid Levels with the supposedly wonderful view.

 

I arrived a little late; it was raining hard and as I was organizing my umbrella the door opened.  I hardly stepped in when I was not only in the hall but also the living room and nearly in the kitchen.  As professor’s guest said it is a ’step saving’ apartment.  One step to the right from the entrance hall and you are in the kitchen two steps from the kitchen and you are in the master bedroom.  Five steps from the front door and you have reached the window to observe the most fabulous view of the Harbor.  One step from the couch (I must ask him how they got that to the 12^th floor it’s bigger than the elevator) and you are in the second bedroom which to some is really a built in robe.

 

Ahh but that’s Hong Kong for you, probably Asia actually.  You don’t need a lot of room, you don’t spend a lot of time at home, but you need a view.  That’s why we live in a big apartment in Happy Valley because we have no view.

 

I could imagine a weekend at the Professor’s reading “A room with a View”.  Not moving off that couch all weekend, if only he moved that fridge into the main living area.  Perhaps he could put that on rollers like the TV stand so you could just have easier access to the beer.

 

I’m so glad I got a real glimpse of a local apartment, you see us expats who supposedly come out here on big business budgets get shown ‘expat’ housing. Our accommodation all has it’s own set of price tags!

 

Thanks for a great dinner Professor, it was lovely meeting your mother, drinking wine, eating noodles and playing mahjong not all at the same time BUT we did do it all in the same spot!

 

 

Wedding Disaster!

What do you say to a woman who says to you “I don’t love him”?  Lots of things I guess, but what if you were still celebrating her wedding that day?  Not much comes to mind.

 

This is a story a friend told me the other day while she sipped another wine having just got over the wedding the night before.  She and her partner had been invited to the reception of two friends one of whom they knew quite well, well as can be expected. 

 

I guess my friend must have realized there something wrong because she told me a guest at the wedding toasted the bride and groom in the most unusual manner.  The toast was more a threat along the lines of you do anything to make life miserable for the bride and you will rot in hell.  I believe most of the guests at this point started to see the whole thing as a joke or the very least not going to last.  Divorce papers were being discussed before the bridal waltz was played.

 

It is said that the bride was a bit worse for wear and during most of the speeches she had her head down ‘resting’ no doubt from the enthusiasm of being a new bride.  Well at least at this wedding there was more alcohol flowing I am told than the recent Beer Festival my husband attended in Tsing Toa.  He tells me he didn’t see any beer there.  Well apparently there was no beer from other countries and that’s what it was being called ‘The Tsing Toa International Beer Festival’.  Perhaps that’s because the beer got drunk at the wedding where my friend was?

 

A few of the wedding guests hung back because it was clear the bride and groom had nowhere to go so the stragglers offered to take them on to a bar in the bar district. It’s at this place the bride whispered across the table to my friend “I don’t love him”.  Those that hung back witnessed the bride lash out at a late arriving guest who she accused of trying to have it off with her new husband.  I’m confused she didn’t love him so why would she care?

 

I don’t know one can only feel confusion, especially as my wedding day was the happiest day of my life.  I didn’t drink I didn’t need to I was so high on life that day I came across as drunk.  Well at least one of my friends accused me of this months later.  It was too bloody hot to drink and the beer would have been warm more than I can say about Tsing Toa where there was none.  I guess I’ve never experienced anything in Australia where there wasn’t a beer around.  I do miss my Ice beer, Coopers Ale and the odd VB at the London in Balmain.

 

I’m glad I married someone I love and occasionally have a Tsing Toa with or a San Miguel. 

PS I wrote this letter from Hong Kong about five years ago – and the friend I mention is me! – I was the person that experienced this whole wedding – it’s funny now but at the time! oh boy, oh boy what a disaster.

 

What time is it?

Occasionally I would run into my friend Michael who was the program manager for 3AW-radio personality Derryn Hinch.  If you asked Michael how work was going he would say, “what time is it?” which meant did he still have a job.

 

Sometimes I think of that when it comes to my husband’s life in the tech industry.  But even in these uncertain times I am convinced that the world needs people like him and there will always be a tech industry from now on and though they call it the new economy in a few years it must be seen differently.  It will be part of the old economy no different from a brewery, automobile maker or the Golden Arches.

 

How new are those industries, not that much newer but still part of the old economy.  So give it a few years and Computers will be part of the old economy.  What’s different is that they are more and more in our homes than ever before and at a faster rate than a happy meal was.  I think therefore that makes the new economy more frightening for a lot of people.

 

With the type of work my husband does he tells me he will always be travelling.  So now nearly five years into being married I am used to asking “will you be here next week?”  Sometimes when I’m frustrated with the fact he’s around I ask little questions like “are you travelling soon?”  One of my good friends married to a similar travelling husband would say nicely “haven’t you got some country to visit next week”.

 

Deb and I both love our husband and both feel we had married the right person, we are both in love with our men.  BUT just having a little break every month is also good for the marriage.  In fact sometimes I wonder if that’s why our marriages are so good.  The travelling gave us, our space, our freedom and independence.  Now I don’t think this is for everyone but given both Deb and I married later in life we were used to doing our own thing.

 

My desk is messier when he’s not around, my activities don’t seem to be scrutinized as much and most importantly I can hang out at the computer longer while he’s away.  We share the office area so with him around home (especially as now he is trying a work from home program for the company) I cannot come into the office if he’s working there.  The big sighs and the earplugs in his ear are enough to warn me off.  Now he tells me the earplugs are only there because I tend to bash the keyboards.  My excuse is I type fast. 

 

I do like it when he travels I can make as much noise and mess as I like, I only have myself to answer to.  It’s a bit like having no parent around!

 

It does get down when they are away and a whole bunch of couples are doing something so you feel you should not intrude.  But then again sometimes it’s hard when a whole bunch of women do something and you feel you should stay home because DH (darling husband) has been on the road for 3 weeks.  You feel you should spend time with him.  Why don’t they choose a week to see a movie when he’s out of town!

 

This travelling of a spouse makes for an interesting marriage, it can be stressful but it can also be fun.  You learn to make major decisions like what school your child should attend or where you are going to live without your partner. You learn all about fixing trains transformer toys and that your children use your husband’s absence to get things. You learn to call on others when the computer shows signs of stress.  You learn to store up those unanswered questions till when he comes home and pick the right time to bring it up.  You learn not to pounce on a tired hungry jet lag husband with a problem till at least 24 hours.  You learn that when it comes to big questions you and your husband are often the only ones that care and the company really doesn’t.

 

So if you choose this life think carefully because a travelling spouse is not around to help you change a nappy (diaper), convince a child lettuce is good for you or help you do the taxes!